The Kitchen Sink

Kristine got some good news today, Tuesday. Her brain scan revealed no new disease and that the one remaining tumor, radiated earlier with Gamma Knife, continues to shrink. This was a much needed confidence boost after last week's seizure and as we head into an appointment with our Oncologist on Thursday to discuss the tumors in her lung and lymph nodes.

Our appointment with the Herbalist last week went well. He changed a couple of the herbs that he prescribed for Kristine, but didn't complicate our daily routine too much more. Two of the herbs he added I had read about earlier as having some clinical research data suggesting success in treating cancer cells. So I was surprised when he recommended them.

Kristine is doing pretty well all in all. She continues to have some pain in her right arm from the shoulder tumor that seems to be pinching a nerve. And, just when we thought that our issues included everything but the kitchen sink, our kitchen sink is completely clogged. We've been without both our sink and our air conditioning for a couple of days. The sink has a deep clog that our plumber's snake couldn't budge (old plumbing) and our forced air's blowing unit was pronounced dead by our appliance guy after one of only a few hot spells we've had all summer. All we can do is just take a deep breath and keep moving forward knowing that for any problem that's thrown our way a solution is not far to follow.

Recurring Episode

It occurred in the same place and at almost the same time of night as it had just five months ago.

Kristine was having a tough weekend. Saturday she started to have pain in her right arm and neck which continued through Sunday. We believe it is likely a symptom of the tumor in her shoulder that seems to have increased in size and may now be putting pressure on the nerves and muscles in the area.

The pain she was experiencing remained constant throughout the day. I was in and out of the house for the majority of the day leaving Kristine with just bad TV shows to watch and time for her mind to race as she dealt with her throbbing right extremity. Frustration over the pain she was forced to endure, loneliness from not having a companion with whom to commiserate, and disappointment over coming to terms with the idea that the herbal protocol we have both put our faith in may not be working left her dejected and sullen.

To help Kristine get her mind off of the pain and generally ease her mood, I got her into bed early that evening and started her massage. It seemed to work. She began to doze off at around 8:30pm. But it wasn't long after that she opened her eyes and said, with a slight panic in her tone, that her left arm had stiffened and her left hand had clenched into a tight fist on its own. This turned out to be an indicator of what was to come. Within seconds she began to seize. Like before (almost five months to the day) the left side of her body convulsed rhythmically. Her face, arm and leg jumped as the muscles contracted and released involuntarily. Fortunately, I was by her side while it happened and I grabbed hold of her from behind in an effort to comfort her until the episode passed.

When it was all over Kristine seemed to be left in a daze. She lost movement in her left side as before but regained it more quickly this time. About ten minutes later she asked if she had really had a seizure or if she had just dreamed it, indicating her lack of awareness during the incident.

The doctor told us after the last seizure that another could occur. They are most often triggered by physical stress like a fever or even the cabin pressure of an airplane. The trigger for this episode is unclear though. It could have been caused by the stress of Kristine's increased pain. However, we are nervous that there could be new developments in her brain.

We will see the herbalist on Tuesday, but due to our growing concern that his treatments are not having a sufficient impact we will also be exploring conventional options more aggressively. Kristine has said that she would be open to radiation on or resection of the shoulder lymph node(s) as long as the methods used are less general and more targeted.

The Fantastic Four

Throughout Kristine's illness there have been so many people who have reached out to help. Whether sharing their time or lending a hand, friends and family have demonstrated an extraordinary benevolence toward Kristine and I. Kristine's direct family -- mother, father and three sisters -- have been there for us every step of the way, through the best and worst of times.

But beyond Kristine's own family, there is a group of four women who have gone above and beyond for Kristine and to whom we owe our humble gratitude. Beth, Roey, Tony and Simone divide up each week. They come to our house in the morning and help Kristine to get showered, dressed and ready for the day. On Monday and Wednesday they help get her to the aquatic center in Cherry Hill for her rehab sessions. The rest of the week is all about errands and the more than occasional shopping trip, after all we are talking about Kristine.

These woman are amazing friends and truly special people. They share more than just their time, but an exceptional compassion and kindness that surpasses any that one would or could every expect. Kristine and I owe all of them a great deal of thanks for their unselfishness and generosity.

Thank you Beth, Roey, Tony and Simone for all you do.

One Step Back, Two Steps Forward

Kristine often feels like she just gets to where she can tolerate her collective set of ailments and a new one pops up. In the last few weeks her back has been the issue. The regular coughing fits and inability to sleep in any other position but on her back have caused muscle spasms and a good deal of pain. As you can imagine the accumulation of pain and discomfort take their toll both physically and mentally without the counterbalance of some noticeable signs of disease recession.

Kristine has stepped up her efforts at home to get her body back in shape and in working order. She has started walking without her cane in the house. She has also begun doing various exercises to strengthen her leg and arm muscles. Much of this renewed focus and hope is driven by the progress she continues to see in her aquatic physical therapy class. Her therapist regularly comments on the amazing advancements she demonstrates in just single sessions. She herself can see the progress with even the smallest movements, like being able to lift and hold her leg upright in the water. And in a huge step forward, just last week she started walking into the pool without assistance.

These little milestones are the things that keep her fighting. I get personal joy from hearing about the new things she's accomplished in her classes. She absolutely lights up every time she tells me about them. The energy and spirit she expresses make every ounce of this struggle worthwhile.

We are not scheduled see the herbalist until the end of the month. Kristine has several out of town visitors scheduled to come into Philly in the mean time to keep her entertained. This past weekend her very good friend JJ was in town from Chicago and this upcoming weekend another of her good friends, Alison, is visiting from San Francisco. Each visit gives us both a welcome break from the monotony.